Tuesday, 19 February 2013



Today I remember my friend Aidan who died 5 years ago. A man whose generous life and searching heart was a blessing to many.  I miss my brother’s companionship and searing honesty when it came to the Christian life with all its twists and turns. While Aidan always strove to tell it like it is, he was careful to do it in such a way that it didn’t cause personal offence or hurt. Sometimes in the public forum he did go on a bit and literally tried the patience of some of the saints. However those with the good grace to listen would always reap a unique insight into an aspect of life or a facet of Scripture. I’m glad that I more often listened than grumbled and became a lifelong recipient of grace and kindness at the hand of this most gracious of Christian men. Today, brother with your family and those who became part of your ‘other’ family, I mourn your loss from us and take comfort knowing that your Blessed destination is assured.

 Just last night a lady came up to me whom I had never met before and told me a story about how Aidan had been a blessing to her. Apparently she recognised me from visiting Aidan’s house in Rosbrien, and spontaneously shared her experience of his kindness, oblivious to the fact that this was the eve of the fifth anniversary of his passing. She met Aidan on the street distressed by the fact that she had nowhere to live and he held her hand and prayed for her that the Lord would provide what she needed. Shortly afterwards she passed a building under construction and went in and told the builder of her plight. Then and there she was promised a place to live when the development was completed. She duly took up residence there and saw it as an answer to Aidan’s prayer. As she finished her story she hugged me in recognition of Aidan’s kindness and faithfulness to her in that hour of need. This is one story of many that shows the life enhancing effect that our dear brother had on so many people, the full extent of which we willnever know.

Gerard O'Shea

The following was written John O’Donohue who died just five weeks before Aidan, the thoughts expressed here speak for many of us at this time.

On The Death Of The Beloved

Though we need to weep your loss,
You dwell in that safe place in our hearts,
Where no storm or night or pain can reach you.

Your love was like the dawn
Brightening over our lives
Awakening beneath the dark
A further adventure of colour.

The sound of your voice
Found for us
A new music
That brightened everything.

Though your days here seemed brief,
Your spirit was live, awake, complete

Though we cannot see you with outward eyes,
We know our soul’s gaze is upon your face,
Smiling back at us from within everything
To which we bring our best refinement.

Let us not look for you only in memory,
Where we would grow lonely without you.
You would want us to find you in presence,
Beside us when beauty brightens,
When kindness glows
And music echoes eternal tones.

When orchids brighten the earth,
Darkest winter has turned to spring;
May this dark grief flower with hope
In every heart that loves you.

May you continue to inspire us:

To enter each day with a generous heart.
To serve the call of courage and love
Until we see your beautiful face again
In that land where there is no more separation,
Where all tears will be wiped from our mind,
And where we will never lose you again.


Anonymous said...

The 5th Anniversary of the Premature Death of my Brother Aidan.

19th February 2008- 19th February 2013

“Psychological trauma is an affliction of the powerless. At the moment of trauma, the victim is rendered helpless by overwhelming force. When the force is that of nature, we speak of disasters. When the force is that of other human beings, we speak of atrocities. Traumatic events overwhelm the ordinary systems of care that give people a sense of control, connection and meaning.”

Judith Herman, Trauma and Recovery

The deaths of 3 siblings in a very short space of time were the events that traumatized my brother Aidan and brought on severe depression. Of the 3 siblings’ deaths that effected him, it was the death of my brother Paddy that traumatized Aidan the most. He had spent 25 years of his life caring for Paddy, who was brain damaged; the result of a Hit & Run accident. Aidan felt lost and rudderless and didn’t seem to have any hope for the future.

He sought psychiatric help for his depression and was put on antidepressants. The medicine that was meant to cure him, became the poison that killed him. It has taken me 4 years to find out about the “murderous” effects of antidepressants. Medication Madness: The Role of Psychiatric Drugs in Cases of Violence, Suicide, and Crime by Peter R. Breggin, M.D. is a book every psychiatric, doctor and patient should purchase and study. What you will read, will blow you away! Here are 2 websites where you can find more information on www.PsychRights.org and www.icspp.org.

Tony said...

What a beautiful story and a fitting tribute to one of the finest Christians I have ever known and I consider it a blessing that I could call him my friend!

Wyn Bryan said...

Lovely & well-deserved tribute.

Peter Plus Betsy O'Donoghue said...

thanks for sharing hard to believe 5 years
Yesterday at 1:15pm ·